What to Do When You First Get Engaged?


With Valentines Day recently passed, there would have been many newly engaged couples waking up beside their new fiancés in the past couple of weeks full of excitement, trepidation and for some fear.

Now I don’t mean fear in a negative way – its just when the first flush of excitement has died down a little and word starts to spread amongst loved ones, the realization that there is a whole wedding to plan can be rather daunting! So here are a few little tips for ways to keep the excitement and be able to take all the rest in your stride.

Decide what’s right for you as a couple first

It’s natural that friends and family will be full of excitement for you and as soon as you tell them that you’re engaged you’ll receive a barrage of questions into the why, where’s and whatever’s. Before you talk too much with your friends and family about possible ideas it’s always best to sit down with your fiancé and discuss what sort of day would make you happy.

With this a reference you then can be sure that whatever ideas that you end up with is reflective of a day that you both will enjoy and not the result of lots of other peoples ideas, criticisms, compromises etc. With an outline of the initial plan your family can then help make sure your special day becomes a reality and everyone can remember that it is your day and not theirs.

Do put your enthusiasm to good use

Planning a wedding does take a lot of time and many hours will need to be spent researching ideas, talking to people in the know and juggling finances. The more ‘idea gathering’ that you can do in the initial burst of excitement before everyday life takes over again will definitely help.

Create a folder on your computer and bookmark any ideas that you find – believe me you won’t always remember where you found something and it can be tedious to trawl back through internet history. When reading magazines cut out things that you like (even if they’re not wedding related) and put them altogether in a scrapbook so that you can start to build up a portfolio of ideas. If you have very strong ideas about the type of wedding you definitely don’t want it may be useful to collate some examples for florists and dressmakers.


Do sit down and sort out the nitty gritty

One of the first things that you need to know is how many people are likely to be invited and how much money you may have to spend. This is probably the most contentious area of wedding planning – you might want to invite 150 but only will be able to afford a sit down meal for 50, you may prefer an intimate wedding with only close family and friends but your other half can’t imagine being married without the rest of the football team to offer their congratulations.

Whilst your dream day shouldn’t be too dictated by money (there are shortcuts and ways to achieve the day without the budget if you use your imagination) it’s important to have some realistic idea of what you’re working with. It’s the first thing to consider when choosing venues and may even dictate how long it will be until the wedding. So have the conversations early on, write a sample guest list to have an idea of numbers and see how much you’ll be able to save.

Enjoy being engaged

Don’t forget to relish in the excitement of it all, being engaged is a very special thing and even though you are excited and want to start planning, take time out to visit friends and family to share the good news. Consider throwing a celebration party or dinner to celebrate, it is the start of something very special after all.